Tuesday, February 6, 2001

Cheerleader Camp


Directed by: John Quinn
Starring: Betsy Russell as Alison, Playboy Playmate and porn superstar Teri Weigel as Pam, Lucinda Dickey as Corey, and LEIF FRIGGIN' GARRETT as Brent (no joke!!)

J-Rock's Review:

Ah, the glorious 80s. The decade where horror movies abounded, snorting "crank" was cool, and Ally Sheedy had a job.

Back in that fun decade, Hollywood just pumped out stupid slasher horror flicks and sequels upon sequels.

The main differences between then and now are when a horror movie gets made today, nine times out of ten it has the following qualities:

1. It stars Matthew Lillard.
2. The poster is blue and black with the stars' heads aligned in a V.
3. It stars Noxzema girl.
4. There is no gore.
5. There is no nudity -- an unforgivable crime in my book.
6. It stars Buffy Michelle Gellar.
7. It sucks.

But back to the 80s. These years were truly the golden age for crappy slasher flicks. One of these was Cheerleader Camp. The title basically explains it all, but I'll elaborate for the sake of making this an interesting website...here goes: a bunch of cheerleaders go to camp to learn new stuff and have a competition or something.

All of these cheerleaders have big hooters.

Except one. And that's why she's a mascot, with the big fake head and all.

This makes her INSANELY jealous of the big-hootered cheerleaders, and thus she decides to kill them all.

But thankfully not before we see lots of gratuitous hooters.

The killing in this flick isn't too bad either, and there are actually some pretty funny scenes, too.

I'd definitely recommend this one, but not if your girlfriend or your mom is around, and especially not if your girlfriend IS your mom (so you southerners are out).

Let's end this review before it gets any stupider. Oh yeah, there's a sequel called, you got it, Cheerleader Camp II!! I'll let you know when I see it!

For more from the IMDB: Cheerleader Camp