Sunday, March 22, 1998

Gore-Met, Zombie Chef from Hell

1987, Swan Films, distributed by Camp Video (seriously? Camp Video?)

Starring: Theo Depuay, Kelley Kunicki, C.W. Casey, Alan Marx, and Michael O'Neill

J-Rock's Review:
ZERO skulls of 5 skulls

This is BY FAR the worst movie I have ever seen. Truth or Dare had poor production values, but was at least enjoyable for its badness, as was Mother's Day. Gore-Met has absolutely no redeeming qualities whatsoever:

1. It makes no sense.
2. It has bad special effects, which can usually be forgiven, but not in this case.
3. The music sucks.
4. You never see blood or violence, despite the proclamation on the box that the movie was "Too Violent to Rate."

Rob-Dogg almost fell asleep during this movie, that's how bad it is. In the middle of all this crap, there are two scenes that you might enjoy: first a cop has his head punched clean off, then the evil guy rips out another guy's heart and throws it agains a wall. Keep in mind that these scenes are both crappily done, with ridiculous editing and special effects.

If you do manage to find this flick in a video store desperate enough to rent it, you will be dumbfounded that anyone would actually put their name on this movie. However, for some inexplicable reason, Gore-Met has become something of a cult classic. Probably because it's so damn bad.

IMDb: Goremet, Zombie Chef from Hell